Q: Do you engage in motorcycling, hunting or any other pastimes of a hazardous nature?
A: I Watch the Lottery Show and listen to Terry Wogan.
This customer collided with a cow. The questions and answers on the claim form were:
Q: What warning was given by you?
A: Horn
Q: What warning was given by the other party?
A: Moo
A young man walked into our insurance office to purchase coverage for his new motorcycle. Only one question confused him. "Do you have a lien holder on the vehicle?"
"I've got a kickstand," the prospect replied. "Is that the same thing?"
An insurance salesman was getting nowhere in his efforts to sell a policy to a farmer.
"Look at it this way," he said finally. "How would your wife carry on if you should die?"
"Well..." drawled the weather-beaten man, "I don't reckon that'd be any concern of mine - long as she behaves herself while I'm alive."